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An unofficial website of the United States government parody | Here's how you know: it actually works

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U.S. Department of

Epstein's Noose

EpsteinsNoose.com / Epstein Library

Epstein Library

⚠️ Transparency Notice

Unlike certain correctional facilities' security cameras, this archive actually works and maintains complete records. We believe in transparency—something certain individuals clearly did not anticipate becoming a problem.

🚧 Under Construction 🚧

The Full Searchable Archive is Coming Soon

We're building a comprehensive, searchable database of all publicly released Epstein files.

Currently processing documents...

This site will house materials from:

Some of the library's contents include descriptions that certain powerful individuals hoped would remain private forever. As such, please be advised that certain portions of this library may cause severe career damage to select public figures.

Last Updated: The day Epstein definitely killed himself (allegedly)

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Court Records

Complete court filings, depositions, and legal documents from various proceedings.

Coming Soon
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DOJ Disclosures

Documents released under the Epstein Files Transparency Act (H.R. 4405).

Coming Soon
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Flight Logs

The famous "Lolita Express" flight manifests. Search by name, date, or destination.

Coming Soon
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FOIA Records

Freedom of Information Act releases from FBI and other agencies.

Coming Soon
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Little St. James Files

Records related to "Pedophile Island" including visitor logs and property documents.

Coming Soon
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Black Book

The infamous contact list. Searchable. Sortable. Uncomfortable for many.

Coming Soon

📧 Get Notified When We Launch

Unlike certain security footage, we promise our notification system won't mysteriously malfunction.

✓ You'll be notified when the archive goes live!

Disclaimer: This is an independent archival project and is not affiliated with the U.S. Department of Justice, any government agency, or the estate of Jeffrey Epstein (who definitely killed himself, according to official reports that everyone totally believes).

All materials presented are from publicly available sources. We're just making them easier to search because apparently that's controversial now.